The Pairs With Life Blog

  • The Tooth Fairy, Equality, Good Greek Merlot and Other Myths

    On a recent early morning, my nine-year-old daughter emerged from her bedroom, wearing that look I've come to recognize as either meaning, "I have covered the entire bedroom in pink glitter and you will love it" or "I have discovered the hard way that the cat doesn't like swimming." The truth was closer to the latter than the former.
  • "OK! I Love You!"

    I want to blame all of this on the wine, because it's a way better excuse than more likely causes, such as old age, Zoloft consumption, or the soul-imploding monotony of a day job. Either way, my wires are getting crossed. I slip into conversational auto-pilot, and what is typically a salutation reserved for my family and closest friends gets accidentally thrown out at random to strangers
  • The Feminism of Farting

    My first thought was that the experience would probably be completely different than raising boys. Specifically, there'd be no way girls would think farting is funny, because women simply don't think that way. I have not had a wife/girlfriend/horrifying date who thought it was amusing in the least when I sounded the Butt Trumpet. That had to be a man-gene thing, and I would need to monitor this behavior around my sweet, precious, non-toxic girls.